Case of the (s)ex

How much of an immediate turn-off is hearing that the person you might be mildly interested in is going to visit with their ex?

Far too often, our almost-significant others make plans with those that they no longer say "Love" to and (hopefully) aren't continuing to fuck. While the idea of staying in conversational relationships with our exes is considered healthy, one can't help but wonder how often that wondering turns to worrying.

Why does the idea of the ex always include some sex?

While women intrinsically are prone to substantiate platonic yet deep relationships, men tend to be able to dick and ditch; cutting ties before, during and after any kind of sexual activity with another person. While not every man is a slave to his willie, going to visit someone that made that willie feel great is not a happy thought.

In the thought of sex with the ex, when does coming around to friendship actually involve a lack of coming?

I'm from the school of thought that the ex is NOT part of my life, at least for the first couple years post-breakup. If we didn't work out, you need to not exist until I've gotten over you by getting under someone else. If I'm to believe you're 100% interested in me and only my ass (and other choice body parts), then any rumination on that other person who used to be in your life should be either complete ambivalence or a "wow...that was a mistake from the past".

Many, many times have I found a total lack of interest in someone I'm just starting to date as soon as I even hear the word "ex". Rules that aren't made to be broken, break and I'd rather not chance that.

However, there's also the school of thought that a shared interest in the ex could lead to better times in bed, a la Britney Spears' latest dance floor mantra "3". Why just you and me when there can be three? Or four?